Thursday, October 8, 2009

They don't have to understand you... be still.

Things I'm in to lately:

Cereal - a mixture of corn chex, granola and raisins, practically every meal.


not working out :)

Nonfat unsweetened vanilla rooibos tea lattes.

fantasy basketball

Music: Flyleaf, Mute Math - Armistice, Snow Patrol "Hands Open"

making my own clothes

the television show Fringe - JJ Abrams is a genius

Acedia & Me - Kathleen Norris

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

It feels like a brand new day. Open your eyes!

Uh oh, two days in a row!!! Now we're talkin'! Or blogging rather. Anyway. 

My friend Jess loves to take pictures. Recently her camera was broken and she needed to send it in to the manufacturer to get fixed. Then we went to the beach this past weekend and she took an absurd amount of pictures!! 

Here's one of them: 
















In the car the next day I popped in the new Jars of Clay album and when the song "Two Hands" started playing I just kept thinking about standing there on that rock. Here are the lyrics: 

"I've been living out of sanity
I've been splitting hairs and blurring lines
I am a house that is divided 
In my heart and in my mind

I have a broken disposition 
I'm a liar who thirsts for the truth
And while I ache for faith to hold me
I need to feel the scars and see the proof

And if we just keep digging we can reach the foundation 
Of our souls
And if we just keep cutting all the chains from our hearts 
We'll lose control

And it feels like giving in
It feels like starting over
It feels like waking up, and you know it's coming
It feels like a brand new day
Open your eyes

I use one hand to pull you closer
The other to push you away
If I had two hands doing the same thing
Lifted high, lifted high
"


I find in my life that I am continually in that struggle. On the rollercoaster of righteousness. Even with my best intentions I fall short. And I may not glorify God every day, in everything that I do, most times I long for just the opposite. But it is refreshing on those days where I am consumed by grace with both hands lifted high. 


Monday, July 13, 2009

Grace makes beauty out of ugly things.

It's been almost a year since my last post. Let's see if I remember how to do this. 

Watch this clip from Pretty Woman. We've seen this movie, we know what it's about. Vivian is a prostitute, Edward comes to L.A. and decides to hire a prostitute. That's how they meet. Surprise, surprise they fall for each other. But what we see through the movie is how Edward treats Vivian. She does not feel like she deserves anything better than what she is doing. She has accepted that all she will ever be is a prostitute. Edward comes along and changes that and by the end of the movie he treats her less and less like a prostitute and more like a woman. Through the course of the movie she goes from being a product to being a person. From being bought and sold to being loved and cherished. 

Can a fresh word be spoken about me? Can a new word be spoken about me? Or am I defined by what I've done? By who I've been involved with? By my failures, short comings, missteps? Do my sins determine who I am? Or can a fresh new word be spoken about me? 

Very often we carry all the words we hear with us. We become worthless, meaningless, stupid, useless, mediocre, fat, weird, insufficient, lazy, unworthy. We carry all of the bad experiences we have had with us. We personify ugliness, evil, destruction, disaster, hate, failure. Over and over we hear and recreate the things in our head. We begin to think maybe all these words are true, that they are all we will ever be. The things that have happened to us begin to own us. We desire for a fresh, new word to be spoken about us. 

In Matthew 9, A man comes to Jesus begging him to go see his daughter, who is supposedly already dead. While he's on his way: "A woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, "If only I touch his cloak, I will be healed." Jesus turned and saw her. "Take heart, daughter, " he said, "your faith has healed you." And the woman was healed from that moment. 

In the time of Jesus this woman would have been labeled unclean. No one would have wanted to be around her. She was looked down upon, ridiculed, made fun of, given dirty looks. She was not allowed to go into the temple, to worship God, because of her uncleanliness. She was an outcast. She had been pushed out of society, kicked to the edge, not welcome. 

Then she has the audacity to go up and try to touch Jesus. And of course Jesus responds in a way that no one else ever would have. He looks down at this woman. With all her filthiness and shame. He looks at her and calls her daughter. 

So may we come to see that the words we say are important. May we see that the way we talk to people matters. May we be able to reach into people's lives and speak rejuvenation. But may we also see that all those words we have heard, all those things we have felt are old and stale. Jesus longs to speak a fresh, new word about us. "Take heart, daughter."

Lemon out...

(Adapted from a Rob Bell sermon called "New Skirts".)